To my Son

Good Morning, Baby!


I have been thinking about this post for quite some time, since this is a momentous occasion. Maybe more so for me than for you, but momentous nonetheless.
I still tear up whenever I really, really think about how you have blessed me and your daddy- you certainly are a gift sent from God, one that we, at one point in our lives, never thought would actually be given to us. You have been not exactly what we were expecting, but MORE than what we were expecting.
We prayed that you would be a happy child, and seriously, we got that tenfold. You are a ridiculously smiley, happy-go-lucky little child. You laugh at the kitties, you laugh at daddy's work badge, you laugh at yourself. You laugh at mommy when she tries to crawl as fast as you. You greet me each morning with a huge smile stretched across your face. Now THAT is a great way to start the day!
We prayed that you would like music, and man, we can't keep you away from our piano. And you play it so nicely, too- you rarely ever bang on the keys- you are content to do one finger at a time. Sometimes you end up with some very sweet melodies! You love to praise God at church by clapping along and dancing your little baby bouncy dance, all the time with the biggest, goofiest grin on your face. You sing yourself to sleep- a flutey, lovely sound.
We prayed that you would get along well with others. You have more friends than we can count- people who love you for the sweet, gentle way that you are, for the hyper silly play when you are over-tired, for the love that you have for people already is amazing. You have baby Ruthie, Gabe, your cousin Evie, Noelle, Sam, Samuel, and others who are close in age that you are just SO excited to see every time we get together. Your happy squeals when you play with the other kids is really, truly music to my ears.
We prayed that you would be cute. Well, Daddy was pleasantly surprised by your handsome looks from the beginning :) Your blue eyes are something to behold- I have never seen eyes like yours- they are bluer than mine, bigger than Daddy's, and just stunning. Everyone comments about your eyes! Your constant smile makes you even more adorable than any other physical feature- you are just so cute! Your grandma says I need to be careful how often I tell you this, since it could give you a big head, but this is a special occasion, so I can say it all I want. You are just so darn cute.

Praise the Lord for answered prayers!


This past year has been wonderful. Wonder-full.

From the first time I met you face-to-face, at 4:20 am on that cold, snow-filled day in December, your tiny cries muffled by the fluid still in your lungs, that cleared out without a hitch, to the first night at home when I had the worst30 hours of my life, to the many nights where it was just you and me because Daddy had to work, the first time you purposefully cooed, then rolled over, then decided to crawl, and now to standing. The way you snuggle your used-to-be-white teddy bear when I set you in the crib for naps and bedtime. The excitement when we read "where is baby's belly button" is contagious- you have such a fun time reading that one with me. Although I think that's because you have a crush on the little girl on the front cover...but I digress.
You will soon have your first steps, which I know will surprise me. Which is incredible. But you will grow up, and that is inevitable. And normal. And exactly what should happen. And what I really do want to happen.

Please know that Daddy and I pray for you all the time, that you will grow up to be excited about Jesus, and be a great, strong, Christian man. I pray that your future holds great things for you, and at the same time, that you appreciate every little moment you have with family, friends, and the time you spend with your Lord.

But for now, little one, I love the moments we spend together: you, me, Daddy. You are amazing. And I love you.

Happy Birthday, Josiah.

Love,

Mommy.

The Mommy Artist in Me

This week's specs:

Challenge #24

Pick a day this week and tell us about it using your camera.

Rules:
1.) Submit as many or as few photos as you'd like.
2.) B/W or Colour
3.) please no tweaking
4.) Photos due Sat. July 18, 2009

This challenge is about telling a story, finding a way to narrate through pictures. You don't have to narrate your whole day, you can pick just a portion of it if you'd like. Have fun!

I decided to narrate my life as an artist and as a mother. You may notice some similarities!!
I also chose to do the whole challenge in B/W- partly because 1) the light that I had today was terrible (we're a bit rainy here), 2) I felt it would tie the photos together, and 3) I honestly see many photographic situations in black and white, and am just more comfortable with it!
To see other people's entries (we have a bunch of new people this week- whoo-hoo!), just
click here

My little painting world

~em

The past 6 months

Josiah, every day I thank our good God for blessing me with you. You are the sweetest little baby, and I tell everyone that you spoil me and daddy- you sleep so well, and are ever-ready with a big smile that just lights up your entire face.
I will always remember how long daddy and I prayed to have you- and for that, you will always hold a special place in our hearts.
I pray that you will continue to grow in the grace of God and become a great, thoughtful, caring, man. In fact, I hope you become like your daddy, and maybe even more. But for now, I enjoy you one day at a time. I love your babbling and blowing bubbles, and I marvel at how strong you have become already- rolling around wherever you want to go. You never were a snuggly baby, but the past couple of days you have taken the time to nestle your little face into my neck, and suck your thumb, and are content to be like that for a short while. What a wonderful thing to cherish!
Tonight I sang to you, nursed you, and brought your cute little head up to my face, and I smelled your amazing little baby smell, just before I gently placed you into your crib, where, as I said goodnight, you flashed your shining smile. I hope to always remember every moment like that one.
Happy 6 month birthday, baby!

With love, always, from your mommy.

Beach Babies

This past Friday, I went up to Sheboygan to visit my sister-in-law and my nieces. We decided to take a short jaunt over to the Children's museum and play around there for a while. The kids had a blast, but, to be honest, I think I had way. more. fun.

cousin Lily, after going up and down the plastic slide a few times

cousin Evie sitting in the Bay room

J man

and last, but not least, and only 2 weeks late, J man's official 5-month photo:

On being a Mom.

There was a time when I thought I would never have the opportunity to celebrate this special day (hallmark holiday as it may be). I got married young (I was 19) to Jonathan (who was 22). We knew we didn't want to have children right away- since we both wanted to finish our schooling. We said we'd give it 3 years, and then we'd start our family.
When I was 22, shortly after graduating college 2004, we decided to start "trying". It was 2 1/2 years since we were married- a little sooner than we had first talked about starting our family, but we felt we were ready. We loved each other and knew we would make fantastic parents to however many children God would bless us with. Little did we know what God had in store for us.
Month after month, and then year after year, still no children. Jonathan and I prayed fervently that God would PLEASE bless us with a child, but the answer always seemed to be "no". Frustrating doesn't even describe it. Angry doesn't even describe it. I felt like I was damaged, even though Doctors couldn't find the reason for our infertility.
I knew that I was really hurting inside when, in February 2006, I had planned a baby shower for my brother and sister-in-law's first child. I thought I was pregnant. I was over a week late, and felt sick. The morning of the shower, I knew I wasn't. Unfortunately, I took it out on Jonathan- I was angry and said some things that were hurtful. I got to the shower, and burst out crying. I didn't want to be there, celebrating the upcoming birth of my niece, when I had been trying SO LONG to experience what she was experiencing.
Things like that seemed to happen more and more- friends and co-workers getting pregnant "unexpectedly"- or "sooner than they had planned". Jealousy stepped in. I tried to be happy for them- and truly was at some points, but the Devil worked at my heart and I became very envious of people with children in general. I just wanted to yell "Do you know how FORTUNATE you are to have your children?!" But they probably wouldn't understand that question, since they didn't experience what I was going through.
Throughout this time, I was still constantly praying to God to please bless me with a child. Then I heard a sermon from Pastor Bill- about Jesus calming the storm- not just the waves and wind of the sea, but of life- the curveballs that are thrown at us that toss our hearts into turmoil. I knew I needed spiritual guidance.
In the summer of 2007, I opened up to Pastor Bill and to our church prayer group about what we were going through to try to have a child. Slowly, my prayer changed from "Bless us with a child, God" to "show us your path to how we should have a family". Adoption was always on my mind...I just knew that it would take substantial funding to begin that process, but I also knew that with time, We would be blessed.I suddenly had peace. Mind you, I still struggled with jealousy over those who seemed to conceive with such ease, but I knew there was a purpose and a plan.
I immersed myself in my artwork, had a couple art shows, and prayed ever more fervently with my husband our new prayer - "Lead us, Lord, to the right way to have a family- whether through having our own child, through adoption, or through some other miraculous way."
Life went on. I stopped using my ovulation kits, my calendars, and instead really, truly enjoyed my relationship with my husband. We grew closer than I thought possible- he really is my best friend and companion.
I had an art show the 3rd week of April in 2008- based on the life of Christ. In it was one of my favorite paintings "Jesus Calms the Storm"- a tumultuous painting where Jesus' arms are raised against the wind and waves, and prevails. This one I was sure to talk about during the show. Jesus calms my heart and my life- He is my Peace.

To say the least, I was a little stressed out (good stress:) that week from planning and finishing the details of the art show. Stress would often affect my cycle, so I didn't think anything of being a little late. The Sunday after my show opening, though, I decided to check. By this time I had probably taken around 10 to 12 pregnancy tests through the years. I had NEVER even had a false positive- I was used to seeing that single line. I expected only a single line.
But on that Sunday, the 20th of April, I got a double line. "Oh, God, You are AMAZING" and "HOLY COW" were some of the first thoughts that went through my mind. I never told Jonathan that I suspected anything or was going to take a test. I actually had to go wake him up (since he had just gone to bed after working third shift) and started crying before I could get the words out. He thought something was really wrong. And when I said, "We're pregnant" he smiled, and simply said, "I knew I'd knock you up sometime". Nice, Jon. Nice.

I remember going for a walk that day and having a smile pasted on my face- seeing the world in a new light- and how amazing this Creation is.
On December 19, 2008, Josiah, my son and Jonathan's son, was born at 4:20 am. The snowiest day this past winter. How do I even begin to describe how fortunate, how blessed, how happy I am to be a mother.



Happy mother's day- God bless you all!

if you hadn't noticed....

Yes, this is my third post today.

I NEED to update on all that's been going on with my J man and my J hubby.
Josiah's new stuff:
1. He can now roll over from his front to his back. However, he has decided that he no longer wants to roll from his back to his front. Go figure.
2. He had his first cereal. Notice, I said HAD, not ATE- anyone who has ever given an infant their first food will understand this) He loves it! Now whenever he sees me eating yogurt, he thinks it's time for him to eat, too.

3. He went to his first baseball game. Too bad Uncle Josh's team lost :(

4. He no longer fits in his 3-6 month clothes. 6-9 month clothing is SO much more comfy. Keep in mind that he is 4.5 months old.

Jonathan's new stuff:
1. He applied to get a job at the FAA I'm not sure what all the details are on it- but I do know the application was 18- yes eighteen- pages long. Basically, it would be more normal hours (no more 3rd shift!) and WEEKENDS OFF!!!!! I am not excited about that at all... ;)
2. He turned the big three-O today! Happy birthday, hubby! I love you!

4 month pics

The J-man turned 4 months old this past weekend- and I actually got pictures done within the week! (I'm so proud of myself ;)

thanks, Auntie Heather for the totally cute hat!

Photo Challenge 11- " Sugar Bear's Quest"

"maybe i'll find my friend in here...nope, not in here."

"my friend must be up here! nope, not up here."

"..... :) ....."

to see this week's challenge, as well as other entries, click here.
have a great weekend, everyone!
~em

3 months old!

Ok, so he turned 3 months old 2 weeks ago, but these pictures were actually taken at that time. :) Enjoy!

Sunday Morning Ramblings

St. Patty's day Playdate

Yesterday Katie invited us over for a traditional dinner of corned beef and cabbage- so we packed our stuff into our Jeep (J man and DDR mat :), and made our way over to their house.
Josiah had a good time with Ruthie, who looked super cute in her Lucky Charms t shirt, and was even so nice to hold his hand- and only tried to eat it a couple times. :)
The food was fantastic, the friendship awesome, and the Dance Dance Revolution.....tiring and sweaty.

Here's one of my favorite shots of the night:

Awwwww!!!

J man was happily playing while I was working around the house, and suddenly it was very quiet........................................................ :)

if you haven't had enough of him yet.....

here are more pictures of the J man :)

Jonathan says that since Josiah can tell who we are by our smells, he ought to put his used socks by Josiah while he sleeps, that way he'll know Daddy really well.


What do you think of that, Josiah?

Josiah Talking

Josiah talking with Mommy. This is why I don't get much done :)

Josiah's 2 month pics...a little late :)

Once again I had to take advantage of the beautiful light coming in our front window- and got these lovely shots of my best model~ happy 2 months, J man!

Fun at Grandma and Grandpa's House

We had a great time this weekend up at Grandma and Grandpa's house- it was awesome to hang out with them again! There are a lot of pictures in this entry, so I'll let them tell most of the story. Here are the highlights:
Josiah snuggled a lot with Grandma.
Josiah snuggled a lot with his cousins.
Grandpa went sledding with Dustin and Ethan- and even went down the hill by himself a couple times- he said it's the most fun he's had in a LONG time!
The kids all got sticky fingers from the rice krispies' treats.